Dating (Horror) Stories From The Field

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So one time this chick was sucking me off, right, and it was terrible. Like the worst. And I was drunk and just wanted to go home. So as she's going at it, I pull her head up to stop her, and she thinks I'm about to blow my load or some shit so she says "what a gentleman!" And I'm like "no, bitch!"

#197
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Shitty, better luck next time (9) - You're gonna be single forever (209)

Nov 29, 2009 11:50 PM - Uhhh - by jason

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Some of my friends think I’m weird for exclusively dating anorexic girls. But, hey, dinner and a movie just got a whole lot cheaper. I also keep sick bags in my glove compartment just in case.

#96
1 Comments

Shitty, better luck next time (7) - You're gonna be single forever (180)

Nov 2, 2009 07:15 AM - Funny - by Kyle

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I met this girl online, hot, and she looked just like her picture. We ended up going at it the night I met her. After messing around for a bit I tried to stick it in her ass. She's not into that, which I found out after she jumped up and got me in some kind of wresting hold. Yeah, I ended up with a torn bicep. Try explaining that away at work.

#440
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Shitty, better luck next time (17) - You're gonna be single forever (171)

Feb 9, 2010 04:40 AM - Uhhh - by CALIENTE69

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I hate having to deal with people who don’t pay on dates. But, I’ve come up with a solution. Whenever a girl doesn’t pay, I just leave.

#95
1 Comments

Shitty, better luck next time (4) - You're gonna be single forever (159)

Nov 2, 2009 07:14 AM - Funny - by Brian

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I hate using the internet for date ideas. This stupid website told me to take a girl out to “go stargazing”. So I was like alright, whatever. We get up to the lookout, no stars. Then I realized I could have just looked up their addresses.

#99
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Shitty, better luck next time (1) - You're gonna be single forever (151)

Nov 2, 2009 07:18 AM - Funny - by Aaron

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So last night I tried to pay a friend (who’s a girl) to “go on a date” with me. Turns out it’s still prostitution even if you’re trying to fuck your own sister

#98
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Shitty, better luck next time (5) - You're gonna be single forever (137)

Nov 2, 2009 07:16 AM - Funny - by Justin

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I went out with this girl I really like, had a great sushi dinner, getting to know each other some more etc. The evening as going really well, until it came time to pay. Credit card 1 - DENIED. Credit card 2 - DENIED!, Debit Card - DENIED!. She had to pay. FML.

#496
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Shitty, better luck next time (48) - You're gonna be single forever (90)

Mar 23, 2010 07:32 AM - Funny - by Darren

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After a perfect date, I close her car door knowing I'm taking her home. As I walk around the car I let out a really big fart, it totally follows me in the car, I just wait for a reaction. She doesn't say a thing, I fucked her in the ass that night!

#25
1 Comments

Shitty, better luck next time (3) - You're gonna be single forever (87)

Oct 4, 2009 07:22 AM - Dirty - by Jahfool

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I need to get mass texting removed from my phone. I accidentally mass texted my family list instead of my fuck buddy list. Shit.

#71
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Shitty, better luck next time (7) - You're gonna be single forever (83)

Oct 30, 2009 05:12 AM - Funny - by Bill

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Dating sucks. Especially when I spend 3 months talking to this girl online. We go to meet up. Turns out it’s my stepmom. Fuck!

#103
1 Comments

Shitty, better luck next time (67) - You're gonna be single forever (76)

Nov 2, 2009 07:26 AM - Dirty - by John

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